Your parents are your one true supporters, since your birth they have been your constant cheerleaders. They were excited when you took those first steps. That is the most basic thing you could have done and they were proud of even that. Often in this rat race of success and sometimes to keep them safe from what we think is dangerous, they become villans in our eyes or sometimes downright toxic and we tend to blame them
You don’t have to achieve some goals to make them love you that you don’t have to please them ever all you need to do is learn basic stuff such as you learned walking but my dear that was a mechanical process, life is complicated one. All they want from you is that you make better decisions and be financially stable.
So that when life gives you lemons you can look literally make lemonade.
You parents are really proud of you, even the slightest of things you do.
I use to think that this was true only when we were small and chubby, but the stands true even today. If you doubt it one bit. Then start doing some basic stuff you had been putting off, for a long time. Like very basics such as arranging your clothes or something they will come around and appreciate even that. Now tell me, when can you find something like this so genuine so pure. I know sometimes we don’t look eye to eye with them and end up having arguments, that’s totally fine, everyone has them.
But instead of ignoring them and not making them understand at least we should try to let them to know what we’re thinking ,what are the facts we are basing our decisions on or what else are we planning in the back of our mind we all know how to do this, but usually be hold back .
why? That is obvious as well, we are tired of second guessing ourselves that we have no energy to make them understand. On those time remember these are the people who took care of you , even when you couldn’t speak . They made you, what you are and maybe you don’t have the energy right now, but you should try to make them see your point.
I may sound like a hypocrite because I have been a constant supporter of “My life, My rules” with time I’ve come to realize that life is a constant collection of happy memories and bitter experiences.
Yes, we should try and grow out of our comfort zones to achieve what we want in our lives but eventually we need to keep sharing our joys and our sorrows with them .
With father’s day just around the corner I just want you all to try and share your joys and sorrows with them just imagine how happy they would be to know that finally you are taking care of your house plants, because younger version of you was just interested in uprooting them and taking the dirt in your mouth.
Remember the glint in your father’s eyes when you brought home 100 on 100 exam paper or when you parked perfectly, that is still there. You just have lost the concept of sharing .
As of sorrows, we always try to keep them away from our struggles and our lows because we think they won’t understand or wouldn’t be able to help you but let me tell you that they might not know the technicalities of your problem but there experience can guide you through this .
Moreover just talking with them will help you appreciate how much you have in your life.
Just trust your instincts and share with your parents, your brothers, your family . It seriously helps a lot. Make it a habit even if you have nothing to share just tell them about some article you read or some health advice .Just never ever take it to a point that you are just having a conversation for the sake of having a conversation .
Have meaningful conversations with everyone you talk to not just half hearted hellos. I am not asking you to fake it or anything like that, I am just suggesting that you open your hearts and let people close to you see what you are struggling with and if not with everyone let your parents know.
Coronavirus : what can we do?
Coronavirus has now been an integral part of our lives for a year, still we are lacking resources and medicines to fight it. The questions we all were struggling with at this time last year was when will we have a vaccine, now that we have vaccines the situation is pathetic, we are helpless and watching this suffering and pain of people around us is taking a toll on our mental health as well as physical health.
Most of us have now experienced it on first-hand basis, mostly mild or moderate cases, but this is different now, this has turned into a catastrophe and the reason behind this is an obvious one we are all responsible for taking this lightly and some have even gone so far as to say that it is a normal common cold. Well, it is conclusive that it is not.
We as a country have failed humanity in this time of crisis even in times such as this the hospitals are shutting their doors to people. The sick are being denied entry in residential areas, the dead have no cremation grounds and what not are we seeing on social media.
Why has the situation come this far? well this is not the time to ask these questions, right now we need to focus on healing ourselves so that we don’t add pressure to the already collapsing health care system.
There are currently many strains of coronavirus in the world and we possibly can not tell which one is deadlier or which one will cause more deaths.
So, in these dreaded times what should we do? Or the more important question is what can we do?
Let’s start with breathing, take a deep breath and brace yourself. Most importantly hat you need to do is align your thoughts in the right direction. We need to pray for those who are suffering, be thankful for what we have and keep our hopes alive.
The thing is that in these times no one is safe unless, everyone is safe.
So, we need to step down from our rush and care about everyone. How exactly can we do this? Donating money, a big YES if you can do that as there are plenty of organizations that are working on ground and are running short of funds so, please open up your hearts and contribute directly to these NGO’s.
Even if you can’t donate, we can help by not adding to the already burdened healthcare system. We should not step out unnecessarily and wear proper N95/99 masks whenever we are outside. Some tips are mentioned as follows-
- Wear N95 masks or double mask
- Wear gloves if you are visiting a public place.
- Change your clothes as soon as you come back home
- Wash everything before using it.
- Regularly disinfect the floors, handles and frequently used articles.
- Change your mask frequently, dry them in direct sunlight after washing.
- do meditation and breathing exercises.
And there are a million other tips like these you can find on the internet and follow them, educate yourself and follow trusted sources.
Even when you are infected, isolate yourself properly, by doing so the risk of transmission is greatly reduced. You might have a mild infection but you never know how is it going to affect the other person. So, you need to isolate properly even when you think its just a mild infection.
There is no conclusive evidence that the plasma therapy or any other black-marketed medicine works against corona. So, please don’t rush to these solutions. They may or may not help but the continuous demand of these things is creating a chaos and putting pressure on the supply chain. Let the doctors decide the course of treatment.
Educate yourself about the disease and follow through. I don’t know what is exactly wrong with us that we cannot comprehend the new normal. We need to understand that it is not going to be like it use to be we will have to adapt social distancing as a practice and wear masks for as long as it takes.
We have to understand that this is a crisis which can be fought only if we support each other. The strong immunity which we all were so sure of is seriously not there. We didn’t suffer much in the 1st wave because we took preventive measures seriously but as soon as the numbers came down, we let our guards down and now it’s a crisis and we are struggling for basic resources. This is not the time to point fingers. This is the time to brace yourself and follow the guidelines and keep yourself safe because that itself is a great contribution.
It is the first time in the history that every citizen can contribute to win a war the “war against coronavirus”. So, here are a few things you can do an YOU DON’T NEED MONEY TO DO THEM- - Promote other charities.
- Don’t hoard any medical or ration supplies. They are the need of the hour let them reach to the people in need.
- Share authentic advices from trusted sources only.
- Use masks even at home if you feel at risk. It’s better to be safe than sorry.
- Appreciate the front-line workers. Yes, the system is under a lot of pressure but they are stepping out every single day to help us despite knowing the risks.
- Share any leads you have about covid resources beds, oxygen, food anything.
- Get yourself vaccinated.
- Educate those who have no idea about this disease, such as your domestic help or anyone else. Help them register for a health insurance by the govt. it is usually free or a nominal fee is required.
See there is a lot you can do even when you think you can do nothing. Also, if you have a hobby which can earn you some money. Since now you have the time to practice it. You can promise to donate those earnings as well. Like I promise to donate all my earnings for this blog and all others which I write during this period. I know this is small, but right now every contribution matters.
So, yeah breathe more worry less, because you need to be in your best shape if you want to help others or even yourself.
The hollow reality of payments banks
Payments banks are the new cool in the market some think they are revolutionary milestones. They may be to some but in this country they are proving to be insufficient time and again. I can’t specifically pin point the grass root cause but if I were to name someone I think that these organizations are taking advantage of the situation and are exploiting our rights at many levels.
Paytm payments bank was barred from opening up bank accounts by RBI because it couldn’t maintain its net worth close to the guidelines. This is a serious action from RBI from which paytm learnt nothing and continued what it does best- advertising and promising hefty cash backs.
But it cannot be said that they dint take any action at all they not only stopped their bank account openings they deactivated many wallets (remember when you were logged out of your account even when you didn’t) under the pretense of incomplete KYC which they themselves were not interested in completing.
You all must be wondering how does any of this affect you as an individual?? Well this is something I am good at explaining. So, here are a few pointers:
Paytm which earlier was a friendly wallet now under the false pretense of completing KYC is using your aadhar data without your consent to open up bank accounts.
Now you may think it’s not that big a problem a bank account won’t cause much harm. But let me tell you its bang on violation of your rights on many levels.
This shady stuff doesn’t ends at opening up a bank account. They further activate or inactivate any service of their choice. Such as issuing you a debit card or credit card and guess what you don’t have to apply or check boxes for it. They do all this by themselves or their zero trained shopkeepers who are doing what they are asked to do. Moreover you come to know about all this from a no- reply E- Mail.
There is tedious procedure to delete your payments bank account if you don’t need it but my question is why did I have one in the first place??
I didn’t need one, I didn’t apply for any and most importantly I don’t want to have one.
In this era of digitalization all these small acts of violations are growing by the hour and we don’t even realize how these things can be major setbacks for us.
In January 2018 we discovered that Rs 167 crore was deposited by gas companies as a gas subsidy to their 31.21 lakh customers. And all these 31.21 lakh customers had no idea what so ever about their money. The customer has the right to choose the bank account in which they want to get their subsidy but in this case the company didn’t offer them much of a choice. After thorough investigation the Airtel Payments Bank lost it license for six months and money was moved back to the accounts of people.
I completely understand that we need to reinvent our ways to be better, but we need to start it at grass root level. Even after so many guidelines we are facing such scandals. This is a straight indicator that we need to be more responsible in first place and these companies should share their detailed prospects of their agenda and most importantly respect the rights of their customers to choose whether they want an account with you or not.
Payments bank must understand that if a person has a wallet with you it doesn’t implies that they need a bank account with you.
Yes your idea is great but it needs a lot more work and reformed approaches than this to function properly.
Justice for Asifa????
How many more deaths do you need to wake up and smell the shit? How many more lives have to be laid? before we start calling a spade a spade
Have we lost it all.
Every time there is some news about rape or harrassment the extent of gruesomeness increases. It’s like their setting some example. Every time I walk alone, I am lonely in dark. Some sinfull act by then comes to my mind .I go we can my knees, I just feel like running miles. So that no one can catch me
Then why do these rapists have some good old merciful punishments( in whatsoever little cases they are named and shamed) Shouldn’t they be treated with the same knives they used on an innocent girl ?
Shouldn’t they be stoned to death?
I want to ask to every learned person out there on what logic is a merciful death or 14 years in prison to a rapist justice to a girl killed cruely by them .
Law is blind not deaf or insensitive Then why can’t it hear all these cries?
I think twice even before breathing. Is this what you call living?
And those of you who think it’s a relevant in doesn’t affects you let me tell you it doesn’t matters what gender subclass you are it does affects you.
You think continuously about this cruelity ,and live in constant fear that someday it may happen with you or your near here ones.
I just have this one question why don’t we have an exemplary punishment for rapists.
So that when next time anyone thinks about doing such an act, He goes weak in his knees, not me or any other girl .
What happened with asif was inhuman.
And people protecting those rapist are damaged beyond repair.
I have no words to express how deeply sorry I am for Asifa.
Our system has failed her , we have failed her.
Can anyone out there tell me –
Where was this girl wrong???
What would bring her justice??
Who is responsible for this loss??
Who ensures this won’t happen again?
Broken
Even if I crack ,
Even if I break,
Or I may even shatter,
But I can act like whole .
I create gaps between,
Parts of my own self,
Not to keep them apart,
But to give them space to grow.
I fill those gaps with experiences,
I seal those gaps with lessons.
I am not afraid of being shattered,
This is unique,
This is a celebration,
Because this makes me different.
To angry ones out there.
Anger is something when you give punishment to yourself for mistakes of others .
Yes sometimes people screw you over and you feel like shouting at them and in the end you end up crying. So whenever you feel like shouting at someone just relax and think whether this thing will matter after 5 years or not .
And if it is insignificant just don’t waste your time in energy.
Sometime it’s not anger, you are hurt sometimes .It is like you feel betrayed and cheated. It’s then when you should tell yourself that the world is full of morons and you don’t always get what you give .
Just be calm and think even if you didn’t get what you expected at least you gave it to them , and your good is bound to get back to you. The more you give the more you get. It comes back to you in some form or the other.
No words can grant you peace ,but you yourself can and this is real Redemption ,forgive the ones who haven’t asked for it .Just don’t repeat the sequence in your brain again and again because in the end you curse yourself for not doing such things not not saying this or that .Discover yourself a Calming exercise like writing ,reading, eating chocolates ,just busting out in front of some close friend etc.
Remember no matter how much restless you are right now, it will end and things you do will remain forever.
Don’t be sad.
You are sad ,think of all the times when you have been happy . Remember ,when you feel like giving up the reason should be bigger than the one you started with. We try to become better individuals, better humans everyday. Just think there are many people who survive much worse . They aren’t victims they are survivors ,they survive not because they are used to pain but because the hope for a better future .
There are endless things which render hopelessness to you, but you must think about that one thing which gives you hope . Every tree blooms and bears flowers there is no guarantee that the Pollen will come and make it a fruit ,nor is it sure about its fate but still every tree blooms , without any expectation . If someday the nature loses its hope surely all of us will die .Similarly you must concentrate on your one single good thought and give it your best shot because a tree needs to Bloom first to bear the fruits and if you lose hope and don’t even become the flower the Pollen is useless to you. If you feel nothing is appropriate maybe you haven’t bloomed yet or, the Pollen is not around just go with the flow and take your chances because the best thing you have is the hope and you must go on .
जब कभी याद आएगी।
सफर तो यूँ ही कट जाता है साथ चलते चलते,
तकलीफ तो साथ चलने वालों के यादे देते हैं।
वक़्त कभी लौटता नहीं,
और यादें कभी जाती नहीं।
यादों का भी अलग दस्तूर है,
जब बनती हैं , तो दिखती नहीं,
और जब दिखती हैं , तो बन सकती नहीं।
जब कभी याद आएगी,
याद आएगी क्योंकी वो तो कभी जाती नहीं ना ।
तो सरदी की धूप में तुम्हे ढूँढ लुँगी,
ढन्डी हवाओं में तुम्हें महसूस कर लुँगी,
बारिश में शायद तुम्हें पा लूँ इस उम्मीद में भीग लुँगी,
चाय भी शायद अब पी ही लूँ ।
शाम छहः बजे ही घर को चल दूँगी,
नल में पानी देख हैरान हो लुँगी,
15 और 30 तारिख को छोले भटूरे खा लुँगी।
जब कभी याद आएगी,
याद आएगी क्योंकी वो तो कभी जाती नहीं ना ।
तो ये सोच कर खुश हो लेना , की ये सबको आती है,
ये किसी से भी दुर नहिं जाती।
ये जान लो ,ये यादें
हौसला हैं ,
हर पल में कुछ और जीने का।
हीम्मत हैं,
अपनी बाते कहने की।
ताकत हैं,
हर चीज में खूबसूरती देखने की।
जब कभी याद आएगी,
याद आएगी क्योंकी वो तो कभी जाती नहीं ना ।
तो मुस्कूरा लेना, खिलखिलाकर हँस लेना
क्योंकि रोने को जींदगी में गम बहुत हैं,
हम गए नहीं है, देखो हमारी याद तो अभी भी तुम्हारे पास है।
क्योंकि याद तो कभी जाती नहीं।
वक्त शायद अब खत्म होने वाला है,
पर यादें तो हमेशा साथ है।
जब कभी याद आएगी,
याद आएगी क्योंकी वो तो कभी जाती नहीं ना ।
तो चॉकलेट पूरी खुद ही खा लेना,
पुरे कमरे में हुड़दंग मचा लेना,
जोर से चीख लेना,
जो सूकुन दे वो कर लेना,
क्योंकि याद तो आएगी,
वो कभी जाती नहीं ना।
काश वो बचपन लौट आए ।
काश वो बचपन लौट आए,
जब माँ की गोद ही थी सबकुछ,
पापा का कन्धा ही था जन्नत।
होमवर्क कर लेना ही थी पढाई,
और शाम का खेल था चुप्पम छुपाई।
काश वो बचपन लौट आए,
जब जिद करना हमारा हक़ था,
और पूरी न होना हमारी मायूसि कारण।
जिसे दूर करने मे सब जूट जाते ।
अब न मायूसि के वो साधारण से कारण,
बल्कि अब मायूसि हे है साधारण ।
काश वो बचपन लौट आए,
जब हंसी बेफिक्री थी,
चेहरा जरा भोला था,
शरीर कुछ ज्यादा फुर्तीला था।
काश वो बचपन लौट आए,
जब चॉकलेट ही जरूरत थी,
खिलौनो की ही नुमाइश थी,
खेल भी अपना था ,और अंत भी ,
अब पता चला न खेल है अपना ,
न अंत है अपना।
काश वो बचपन लौट आए।
fearless
All the fear is just in your mind.
It grips you until you let it,
Fearless isn’t brainless
If I am not afraid of lion,
Doesn’t mean I would sit on one.
I don’t fear you ,
Doesn’t means I would smash you.
Being fearless is like being selfless ,
And brainfull at the same time.
So, to everyone out there be fearless
But not brainless.
chhavi27 